Thursday, 4 February 2010

This week's favourites so far...

There is always much merriment to be had with palettes and palates, especially on a mag such as ours, which regularly mentions both. This week's offering:
Actually we know that children’s palettes develop based on what they are fed from an early age. They don’t miss what they’ve never had.
Meanwhile, in the world of vegetables, all was not well. It was, in fact, almost armageddon:
It is “one minute to midnight in terms of the destruction of UK
horticulture”, a leading vegetable grower has warned.
Okay. Now I know I am being purposefully obtuse here and that this may say more about the wrongful workings of my own brain rather than the actual clarity of the writing... but... to me...
Men, people under 34, and small basket buyers are less likely to use a loyalty card than women and older people.
Translates as:
Men, defined as people aged 34 or less, and people who buy small baskets, prefer to use women and old people than loyalty cards.
It seems I am not the only one. Webby volunteered:
Human males, of whom fewer than 34 exist, and midget purchasers of wickerware...
Someone call the men in white coats...

Oh, and then I spotted an interesting one, which has two very different possible readings.
Customers won't have to pay any more.
In this case, the writer meant "the customer won't have to pay an increased amount" - but it could equally mean "the customer no longer needs to pay". Scary.

And ps.

D'y know what I hate? "on the back of". Such and such a company made record profits, "on the back of" 5% value growth". What does it mean?? Nothing, I think... Eww. Why oh why?

4 comments:

  1. Regarding men 'preferring' to use women and old people to loyalty cards:

    "Actually, you're wrong.

    No preference is implied. Merely an increased likelihood.

    It may be something they hate to do, but that they are forced to. By genes, for example.

    Apart from that you are, as ever, right on the money."

    ReplyDelete
  2. 'who subs the sub?'

    ReplyDelete

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Why did I turn out such a pedant? Well you'd have to ask my TV-banning, lentil-baking, library-enforcing, doctor-eschewing, beanbag-sitting, grammar-correcting, homeopathic, 2nd dan black belt, all-round no-nonsense mother. 'Cos me, I got no idea.